Long-Distance Relationship Advice: 6 Practical Tips

Every relationship has so many dynamics. Making a relationship work requires time, thoughtful effort, forgiveness and forbearance, the ability to communicate well, and deep love. A couple will sometimes need to understand and appreciate each other’s personality and sense of humor and give each other grace. It adds more complexity when all this must be done at a distance.

Long-distance relationships are more common now than ever before. There’s such fluidity in our movements, whether it’s for work, school, family, or other reasons. Travel has never been easier, and opportunities are available in the next city, state, or country. This means that people can start relationships and then carry them on apart, while others start their relationships at a distance.

We all need wisdom regarding how to make our relationships richer, more connected, and more fulfilling. This article seeks to provide some tips to nurture your long-distance relationship. Santa Monica Christian Counseling offers professional support to help couples strengthen their bond despite the miles.

Why Do Long Distance Relationships Exist?

Before diving into advice for long-distance relationships, it may be helpful to consider why these kinds of relationships exist in the first place. Some people can’t conceive why others would want to be in a relationship with a person they don’t see or interact with physically on a daily basis. There are many reasons why people find themselves in relationships with someone who’s far away.

Our ability to connect with another person isn’t limited to being able to see, hold, or hear them. It’s possible to form a bond with someone via text messages or through emails. People can communicate a lot about who they are using their words, and the bond formed through words can be as strong or stronger than one formed in any other way. Through words, a relationship can be built and maintained.

Apart from our ability to connect at a distance, long-distance relationships exist because sometimes you’re committed to someone, and then they move. You meet in person and connect that way, but then something happens that results in one or both of you moving. The connection already formed feels strong enough and meaningful enough to pursue and maintain even when the other person moves away.

Sometimes, the distance is periodic, and so the relationship has seasons of being in person as well as long distance. This is true of couples where one or both partners are deployed for military or diplomatic service elsewhere, and they come home on rotation. It also applies to other relationships such as when in a relationship with an artist who travels for shows, shoots, or performances.

When you form a deep and meaningful connection with someone, you know they aren’t easily replaced or substituted by another person. Distance doesn’t stop people from connecting to and remaining connected with loved ones.

Challenges for Long Distance Relationships

Relationships face challenges of all kinds. Long-distance relationships face unique challenges that can make it difficult for their relationship to flourish. One key challenge is communication.

Due to limited face-to-face interaction, time zone differences, issues with communicating emotions and intent clearly via media like texts, and gremlins in their technology such as internet outages, a couple may not connect as much as they would like to.

Being far away from each other could also bring about a sense of emotional disconnection for the couple. One might feel isolated or disconnected, especially if close friends have their partners with them. Due to the difficulty of sharing those tiny daily moments as well as missing major milestones and special moments, it can be difficult to maintain emotional intimacy.

Trust issues can exist in any relationship, but they can be exacerbated when your beloved is far away from you. The lack of one’s physical presence can make it hard to resolve conflicts and feel a sense of closure and intimacy that couples in person can generate. If infidelity has occurred in the past, that can raise concerns about trust in the present, leading to feelings of insecurity or uncertainty.

Couples who are dating or married and are far apart also face practical and logistical challenges to their relationship. Planning visits and vacations together can be a bit more complicated due to scheduling issues and conflicts. The couple has to consider travel costs as well as other arrangements to see each other. They also must find ways to mesh their different lifestyles and routines and maintain their shared responsibilities.

Some Tips for Long-Distance Relationships

Despite the challenges that couples in a long-distance relationship face, these challenges can be overcome. It’s important from the start to note that it’s not easy.

There are no easy relationships, it’s true. Sometimes, however, long-distance relationships are sold as being easier than in-person relationships. The thinking is that since the other person is far away, you can still have your personal space and go about your day pretty much the same as you would if you were single. This, of course, is not quite true, especially if you want to nurture the relationship.

While long-distance relationships are different from in-person relationships, that difference doesn’t make them easier. In some ways, it’s harder, especially if you thrive on time spent with someone and enjoy your beloved’s physical presence.

There’s a song from 1970 with the lyrics, “If you can’t be with the one you love, love the one you’re with”. Perhaps the song indicates how distance makes it hard to stand firm and not compromise what matters most.

Some things that couples can do to nurture their relationship include the following:

Set clear expectations and boundaries

These matter, especially when it comes to how the couple will communicate, and how often they’ll check in with each other. Being open about what you want and expect will help you avoid misunderstandings with each other and inadvertently failing to meet each other’s needs.

Establish open communication

This includes being willing to have conflict; to be vulnerable and honest about where you are. Couples can feel like they are sparing each other from worry by holding back until they see each other in person to discuss certain things. This can be unhelpful and create even more anxiety because you’re never certain when your partner is holding something back.

You can foster trust in your relationship through honest and transparent interactions. When you know where you both stand, you become more confident in the relationship despite the distance.

Schedule regular check-ins and connection times

Life can get busy, and without intentional communication, it’s easy to lose emotional connection. Not every conversation has to be significant; sometimes, you can just connect to say “Hi” or simply work alongside each other. The moments spent help to forge a sense of connection, even if nothing earth-shattering happens or gets said.

Make time for shared activities

Apart from setting aside time to check in and connect, you can also carve out time to do stuff together. Most places have good internet, and you can use that for your relationship. Whether you’re cooking dinner together over FaceTime, playing online games, or watching a movie together, you’re creating shared experiences that bring you closer.

You can also prioritize your emotional intimacy by doing shared journaling, doing workouts together, or sampling wines together using wine-tasting kits.

Plan visits

Spending time together in person is also important. Schedule your vacation time to allow you to spend time together in person. Being with someone in person is different from seeing them over a screen, and it’s important to your relationship that you share in-person moments, too.

Seek support

You can seek support from loved ones such as trusted friends and family. This can be helpful when you’re feeling isolated or emotionally disconnected. Loved ones can also be a safe space for you to share your struggles. You can also find support from a professional counselor.

Through counseling, you can improve communication and conflict-resolution skills. You’ll have a space to share struggles you may be having about the relationship. Online counseling can be a huge help for couples in long-distance relationships, as you can both be counseled and your conversation guided by your counselor.

To learn more about long-distance relationships or online counseling for your relationship, contact our counselor at Santa Monica Christian Counseling today. The counselors and therapists at our location are ready to help you strengthen your long-distance relationship for the hurdles and joys to come.